rule breaking.

I am a strict follower of rules. As a child I was very obedient.  Look both ways before you cross the street, never touch hot things, ask mommy for help. And as I got older the rules became more and more. No cheating, stop before you turn right at the red light, never lie, pay your tithing. I don't regret any of these things, they have made me who I am.

But lately I've had a weakness. Missionaries. They have lots of rules, and I'm trying so hard to comply with all of them. But I see other people bending the rules and I get so incredibly jealous. Letters are the only thing I have. I won't see him or hear him for 730 days. No instant messaging, no skype, no email, no phone calls, nothing but his written summary of the week. I'm not complaining about my letters, I love them so much, but sometimes I wish I had the guts to bend the rules. Wouldn't that make it just a tad easier? To hear him once? Talk to him, see his face? But that's against the rules, and I can't won't do that.

But it's sooooo tempting. Especially since everyone does it.

But I'm so glad that Tyson is following the rules. He is trying so hard and won't let anything in the way of his service. I would be a distraction, I know. This is better, right?...

I just don't see any benefit for doing it the right way. They go out and come back, and stay for two years no matter what, so what's the point? Ugh.

So, sometimes I wish I was a rebel. But I just can't bring myself to break the rules.